Translate Inner Jobber!

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Big Bearhug: Do You Know?

Alright guys, so there's this Big Bearhug video on YouTube:

And what I wanna know is: Do any of you know what the video is, or where it's available, or who the wrestlers are?  I'm PRETTY sure the beefy stud in the black "Adonis" trunks is Bulldog Barzini (but I've been wrong about these things before), but I don't know about the lightly hairy hunk in the lime green trunks, with the fantastic ass.

The two minutes of this match on YouTube, I love.  So thanks for posting, bearwrestlemuscle.  And while it does feature a big bearhug, a big selling point for me is the reversal, a front sleeper by Fantastic Ass on Bulldog Adonis.  Now, some wrestling purists might say, "I don't know, that sleeper didn't look like it was applied very tight," but I, personally, am all about suspending my disbelief to enjoy the fantasy.  Ooh, and at the end, when the thick powerhouse finally succumbs, going limp and helpless as he fades into unconsciousness, but Fantastic Ass keeps the hold on, grunting and thrusting as he applies some final vindictive pressure, AND as you may know, every second a sleeper is kept on while the victim is unconscious makes it take that much longer for him to wake up.

SO, if anybody has any info about this match (someone had asked in the comments of the video, but it didn't look like that was going to be answered), if you could please tell us what you know in the comments of this post, I bet people will say "Thank you."  And if you don't know, and like me are in the dark, you can always watch these two minutes again, or look at the screenshots I took for this post.

Saturday, April 29, 2017

More Than Just Pretty

What to do, in a situation as I find in Rock Hard Wrestling's Tanner Hill vs Alex Waters, King of the Ring 8, in which both wrestlers are just so, so pretty?  If you're me, you go for the one with the floppier hair, in this case, Alex Waters.  My only tiny little quibble being that Alex does frequently brush his hair back with his hand.  Naw, you gotta let that hair flop, right in your face!

So deciding that the beautiful, beautiful, floppy-haired Alex Waters is who I'm going for, that still doesn't really determine if I want to see him WIN or not.  He's beautiful dishing it out, but maybe even MORE beautiful on the receiving end.  Judge for yourself in these following images, Tanner Hill in green, Alex Waters in blue (very elemental).

This match was generously provided by Rock Hard Wrestling.

Tanner Hill vs Alex Waters

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Beefy Bear Squash: Arn Anderson As A Jobber?!

Or: A Mean Heel Gets His Comeuppance

Or: This Is What It Sounds Like When Heels Job

In the match linked above and playable at the bottom of this post (Arn Anderson vs the Giant), Arn Anderson is the smaller man for a change of pace.  Even so, he does not alter his tried and true technique of attempting to overpower his opponent, which makes him come off somewhat...well...stupid in this match.  Which for me just makes it that much hotter.  Oh that Arn...

A good match if you like to see a solid beefy hairy guy taken down a notch.

Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Too Pretty Carousel Jobber Boy

From the Melanie Martinez videos "Carousel" and "Alphabet Boy" (his buff arms, anyway) comes beautiful model Austin Scoggin, 6'5", just begging for a harsh initiation in a wrestling ring.  SO pretty, could pull off a touch of arrogance, PERFECT jobber material.

Thursday, December 22, 2016

Knock-Out Christmas

Aw!  Just like an exciting Christmas present, Rock Hard Wrestling sent me an e-mail with a download code for Ethan Andrews vs. Zack Johnathan.  Why, thank you so much!

I think there's something here for everybody.  If you like hard-fought, back-and-forth matches, this one has plenty of give-and-take.  If, like me, you're a bigger fan of jobbers, and post-match humiliation, this has plenty of that too, towards the end.

But MY absolute favorite part of this match comes right between the give-and-take and the humiliation.  The knock-out piledriver!  The unconscious victim being unceremoniously hoisted up and dragged into position by the victor!  This is the true heart and soul of the match for me.  (In order to show my favorite parts, but still not give too much away, I've used cheap computer trickery on the images to make them look cartoony.  Besides, it makes it feel like an animated Christmas special.)

Happy holidays, everybody!

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Sexy, Sexy Puppy

Mojo Rawley is like a puppy in his unbounded enthusiasm and eagerness to please.  A great big sexy jobbery puppy.  And this video is just for fun, because even us jobber lovers know that sometimes, sexy moments happen BETWEEN the moves.

Thursday, October 27, 2016

As They Should Be

Wrestler4Hire's Maverick vs. Zach Reno ("Play Toy") features Maverick as he SHOULD be featured.  Not lost in the shuffle of a dozen cruiserweights, but in an inescapable one-on-one.  From body to trimmed beard to brisk, clipped commands, Maverick is tight and business-like.

Poor Zach is also perfection in this video, as the hapless, hairy jobber who STARTS the match chained to the ring.  Maybe we're seeing this unkempt stud as HE should be, too.  Poor bad doggy.  Sometimes, when you're faced with insurmountable odds, they really DO prove insurmountable.  (Hee hee, I said "mountable.")

By the vicious end of this match, one man is calling the other "Master," and you know, without wanting to give anything away or anything, it's probably the one you think it's gonna be.