The Mistress Of Wrestlemania 2

Who DOESN'T love it when wrestling's not afraid to have cheesy celebrity crossovers? Well, I mean the INTERNET doesn't love it. But I, personally, was only happy when I found out Elvira had commentated the LA portions of Wrestlemania 2 with Jesse Ventura and Lord Alfred Hayes.

Hey, 2K! Here's your next wrestling game celebrity DLC right here!

Elvira joins Jesse Ventura & Lord Alfred Hayes on commentary at Wrestlemania 2

Elvira's comics series from the 90s is being reprinted here

THIS MATCH! A-Kid vs Will Ospreay - Total Rumble 9 - 30/03/2019

A-Kid vs. Will Ospreay is currently one of my favorite matches. It's kind of a squash match and a competitive match all at the same time.  Which sounds like it doesn't make sense.  But one of them seems to be outclassed, out of his depth, and yet never stops fighting back the entire time.

Even the arena feels like a character in this match. It feels like nothing I would EVER see televised and that saddens me.

At 27:44, Will has A-Kid set up, and makes sure A-Kid stays in place...

...so that at 27:54, he can continue delivering kicks to the kid's unprotected face.

At 29:09, Will prepares a devastating elbow attack...

...but at 29:14, A-Kid collapses before Will can connect.

And at 29:16, Will starts to get pissed...

Will Success Spoil Sean Pford?

Why, yes!  Yes, I am THE Sean Pford, as interviewed in an article in Input Magazine by Chris Stokel-Walker.  No, I don't mind being recognized!  No, it wasn't my first time being interviewed!  In junior high, a reporter for the school paper once asked me what my most embarrassing moment was.  I answered, "Nothing," and did not appear in the completed article.  But this time, yes, I'm there, along with some other pretty big names in online wrestling jobber circles.  One of my sentences even got printed in big letters between paragraphs, marking me as, in all modesty, pretty legit.

All in all, a pretty thoughtful piece about wrestling, jobbers, fetishization, and, er, "middle-aged gay guys."  Read it here!

Sean Pford: Kind Of A Big Deal

Scott Hall

 

Very sad that we've lost Scott Hall.  One of my all-time favorites.  Watch some of his matches here.

Pretty Deadly Dancing

Before they were Pretty Deadly, "Playboy" Lewis Howley and Sammy Smooth (eventually to be known as Sam Stoker) made an entrance at 4TB Wrestling that I just love, showing off their dirty dancing.  They looked like they were having fun, the crowd was into it, pro wrestling at its best.  Source videos listed after the images!

The videos:

Just the dancing:

The whole match:

Rey's video that brought this to my attention:

Bonus: An alternate song that plays perfectly imposed over Lewis and Sam dancing:

Thanks, Rey!  'Cause day-um!

Best Gear: Ron Reeves

 

Best Wrestling Gear goes to handsome Ron Reeves.  It's sexy AND funny at the same time.  It's a visual pun: Yes, it's a Ninja Turtle, and his nose even bulges out appropriately.  Well done, Mr. Reeves, well done.

The images are from Ron Reeves & Milad Akbar vs. Cousin Eddie & Backwoods Brown.

The WWE 2K22 Leak Part 2 (And Pretty Deadly)

Or, maybe ALL the information in the 2K22 leak was accurate.  But that means the nWo edition was accurate too, and like I said, I'm never opposed to more Hall and Nash (particularly Hall) in my life.

Something else about the game: The return of GM Mode offers the chance to take control of Raw, SmackDown, NXT or NXT UK.  They included NXT UK!  Does that mean there will be a lot more NXT UK stars included in the game?  Will they include 287-day-reigning NXT UK Tag Team Champions Pretty Deadly, Lewis Howley (blond) and Sam Stoker (brunet)?  One can hope!

I love these guys.  I think Pretty Boy Wrestlers should be encouraged.  I like Lewis, because Legolas.

The Mighty Hammerstone

"Our hero, our hero claims a warrior's heart..." 

Alexander Hammerstone is professional wrestling's big mighty Viking.  Right out of Skyrim (more video games!).  And how wonderful that he's right in the middle of a story in MLW Azteca, which sees the revival of Lucha Underground!

Alexander Hammerstone and Pagano vs. King Muertes and Taurus
Hammerstone is carried away by villains (and that guy in the audience just couldn't resist patting that ass)

Alexander Hammerstone vs. Brian Cage

Alexander Hammerstone vs. Chris Dickinson

AJZ, The Golden Boy

My newest wrestling crush: AJZ (Andreas Ziegler).  Just found his stuff recently on YouTube.  I don't think I need to go into why I like him.  He's pretty gorgeous and I'm pretty shallow.  (He kind of reminds me of a young "Prototype"-era Cena.)  He wins sometimes, which is awesome.  He gets his ass kicked sometimes, which is REALLY awesome.  Trunks?  Tiny.  Muscles?  Huge.  Ass?  Perfect.  Hair?  Handle.  Oops, I guess I DID go into why I like him.

vs. Alex Hammerstone (who's also great)

vs. Graves

vs. Graves

vs. Omar Amir

The WWE 2K22 Leak (And Why I Hope It's Fake)

Today it's about video games!

So WWE 2K20 was heart-breakingly, devastatingly bad and broken, and 2K still needs to apologize for that.  But I AM being cautiously optimistic about 2K22, because I WANT it to be good.

WWE 2K20

Some rumors have surfaced about a "leak," which I don't know, I GUESS could be true, but it could also be someone online just trying to see if they could make people believe stuff, 'cause that's the kind of thing people do now.

But I don't think the leaks sound all that great, and I would PREFER it be fake.

First, the cover was allegedly leaked:

Usually, when a cover is revealed, it isn't for a specific console.  And if the next-gen PS5 IS what they're pushing, that's a little disheartening.  After the horrible 2K20 debacle (search for the glitches and you'll see what I mean), 2K REALLY needs 2K22 to be a good game, and in my opinion, dedicating all their concentration on current-gen systems (Xbox One, PS4) would be a smarter use of their time, than dividing their energies between both that AND the next-gen, that not a lot of people have.  For one thing, who can afford that anyway these days (I can't so I pretend nobody can to make myself feel better), and for another thing, where ARE they, anyway, if you don't have one already?  The Pandemic making microchips hard to come by lessens the chances of huge increases in homes with PS5's and Xbox Series Whatevers.

As for the art itself, I mean I don't HATE Rey Mysterio.  I liked him in Lucha Underground, when Chavo attacked his protégé Dragon Azteca Jr., and Rey was cradling Azteca in his arms and looked up dramatically and shouted to the heavens, "CHAAAAVOOOOO!!"  But I DID like 2K20's "a man and a woman" cover, that would be cool to see again.  Sucks if the dumpster-fire of 2K20 was the only time a woman gets the cover (other than that year there were like five people on the cover and one was Torrie).  And I was really hoping Rob Schamberger art would be used for the cover, but that's just a personal preference.

(SIDE NOTE: You know how Rey's working with his son Dominik?  Also, you know how everybody knows wrestling is entertainment, more of a TV show than just a sporting event?  Well I wish they would have had Humberto Carrillo play Dominik Mysterio.  I just like Humberto so much better, and then he'd have such a bigger role to play!  Is that a hot take?)

Another part of the leak: Pre-order Bonus: WWE 2K Undertaker Immortal Pack. When It's Your Yard It Hits Different. Lay down chokeslams as The Deadman.

The WWE 2K22 Undertaker Immortal Pack includes three additional Undertaker personas: Phantom Mask Undertaker, Lord of Darkness Undertaker, Boneyard Match Undertaker, MyFACTION EVO cards for Undertaker, and MyFACTION Perks and Bonuses.

The WWE 2K22 Undertaker Immortal Pack is included in the WWE 2K22 Deluxe Edition and WWE 2K22 nWo 4-Life Edition

This would be pretty disappointing.  I mean, each game already has like three Undertakers in it, a couple with multiple outfits.  Will they suddenly be holding back on their Undertakers unless you pre-order the Deluxe Edition (or purchase the DLC)?  Or do they intend to have like, seven to ten (slightly) different variants of Undertaker?

And other than just mentioning this "nWo 4-Life Edition," there's no clarification on what that actually even IS.  I love me some Scott Hall as much as anybody else, so I'm not actually opposed to this (or at least, to finding out WHAT it is).

One year, Kurt Angle let out that he was a surprise pre-order bonus in a game before 2K was ready for that, and it forced their hand in confirming that early.  2K has responded to this leak on their Twitter, saying there's a "Big Announcement" coming in three days.  In that little six-second video, there is an "R" that slides onscreen.  Confirmation that Rey IS the cover star?  Will they confirm all these things, or show us what really IS in the works, if something else?