Translate Inner Jobber!

Friday, October 31, 2014

Dat Jack-O-Lantern Tho

Billy Herrington

Happy Halloween, Inner Jobbers!

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Joe Knows

Joe Dorgan, AKA Johnny Parisi, AKA Johnny Swinger.  His matches are a mixed bag for me: First and foremost, SUCH a turn-on, because he's only rising in my estimation and might possibly be the hottest man alive.  (That's right.)  But kind of saddening, because watching jobbers get beat up IS kind of sad, even for all its hotness.  (I think that's nature's way of keeping me from being too sadistic.  Or possibly nature's way of keeping me from just getting off on jobbers all the damn time.)  Also kind of saddening because there aren't a lot of high image-quality matches of him, on account of giant corporations and the decisions they make and things that piss me off that I have absolutely NO control over whatsoever.

Third, The Man As He Was Named: Joe Dorgan

(Probably with some Johnny Swinger mixed in there because I don't think he wrestled as Dorgan for that long.)

Joe Dorgan vs. Marty Jannetty: October 30, 1995

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Just Swing It

My obsession with Joe Dorgan, alias Johnny Swinger, alias Johnny Parisi, continues.  That huge chest!  That narrow waist (contrasted to his chest, anyway)!  That ruggedly handsome face!

Second, As He Most Often Wrestled: Johnny Swinger

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Parisi In The Spring

Alright, back to basics.  Johnny Parisi was a wrestler I loved seeing job out on WWE TV a few years back.  In my mind, he never really got a fair chance to show what he could do, and they got rid of him too early.  (He wrestled on the "B" show, Heat, but was the only superstar to never appear on his flagship show, "Raw."  Unless you count that time, under the "Joe Dorgan" name a few years before, when he lost to Marty Jannetty...)  But recently I've looked back on him, and I realize that I think he's hotter NOW than I did THEN.

His real name is Joe Dorgan, he wrestled as Johnny Parisi in the WWE, but he's more known for his wrestling persona Johnny Swinger.

First, As I Knew Him: Johnny Parisi

Monday, October 27, 2014

Happy Dog

You'll remember that my favorite part of Halloween Havoc 2010 was Big Sexy choking Z-Man with a chain?

Well, I've been informed that Halloween Havoc 2013b took that part and extended it: We have Z-Man vs. Red in the first Thunder's Arena dog collar match.

I know that this kind of gimmick isn't for everybody.  But this is definitely a good find for people like me, who like a little, you know, fantasy with their wrestling.  I mean, when you've got tombstones and jack-o-lanterns and axes and two ripped guys joined at the collar by a length of chain, you can pretty much kiss "old school" goodbye!

Friday, October 24, 2014

Chain Wrestling

In Halloween Havoc 2010 from Thunder's Arena, there is a point (as described in their online catalog) when Big Sexy "even walks Z-Man around the mat like a PET DOG!"

I'm just here to state, as a satisfied customer, that this part goes on for longer than I thought it would, and is much hotter than I thought it would be.  It's not just dog walking going on, there's some basic puppy training in there, too.

Now, this IS just one part of a much longer match.  But the rest of the match is pretty hot, too.

I love Halloween.

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Best Wrestling Name

...belongs to Doug Acre.  I LOVE that name.

Movimus Wrestling gives us Dave Markus vs. Doug Acre.  (Doug in red, Dave in yellow.)  The grappling is as tight as the bodies.  The action is crisp, and presented in bulging 4K resolution.  The cameras are RIGHT UP in there.  And the end results...!  I don't know if that's ever happened before, but it DEFINITELY cries out for a rematch.